people love being miserable

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I am beginning to think I waste my time trying to pursue the greater good of happiness because the more I get to know people the more I realize most just really enjoy being miserable!

I am not saying I am an exception to the rule as there are days for sure where I just want to sit and wallow in my own self pitty…but people who do it on a regular basis are really REALLY starting to make me reconsider drinking again…lol

And more and more I notice people do not take blame for their own misery, they are very happy with accusing everyone else of being the problem rather then factoring in that THEY have control over their own lives and make all the decisions and if they really don’t want to be a certain way they DON”T have to be.

When I was younger I went out of my way to blame everyone else, I mean after all I was a VICTIM!
How could I take the blame for my life gone wrong when I was the one who was abused, I was the victim, it was all their fault……And you know for awhile it very well may have been but as I got older and started acting like an adult and wanting more people to take me serious I realized one very important thing….I HAD CONTROL! I could stay in that worthless pity party place of self loathingĀ  or I could make changes to my life to become better.

Getting there was not easy, but one of the main things I had to learn to do is accept responsibility for MY life, MY actions, MY thoughts and feelings, MY words.
I had to stop blaming my past for the choices I was making today, I had to stop blaming people for how I treated others.
The abuse I suffered as a child did not make me a bitch, I DID! I made a choice to be a bitch and be rude to people what happened to me as a child had nothing to do with that.

What I went through as a child, made me hard and emotional or somewhat emotionless in some aspects it made me fear living, made me jealous of people, I hated my life, I hated my body, I hated living and for years and years I was consumed by those emotions, RULED by them.
Then one day I WOKE UP … I wanted more for myself gosh darn it! there was more to LIFE then being an asshole.
But it was not my mom’s job to fix me, Not my friends jobs to fix me, not my families job to fix me it was MY OWN JOB!

The one thing I hear over and over are statements like theseĀ  “Oh they never helped me, they never supported me, they abandoned me, they didn’t do this, they didn’t do that .. blah blah blah”
Who the hell are THEY?? and why do THEY have so much control over YOUR flippin life??
When you feel like you have no one it may very well be true. It however does not give you license to treat others poorly.
Sadly if you are someone who has no one, take some time out to learn to love you, even just like yourself and making new and better friends will be so much easier and so much more lasting.
People don’t understand that if you can’t like yourself .. NO one else will ever like you.
They may be friends at first but it will almost ALWAYS end bad. Want to know why?
Because people can only take on so much from another person before it drives them away.
If your the always “Its all about me” person then your forgetting about other people and their feelings and they will eventually just become bothered by you and think of you more as a burden or a bitchy complainer rather then a friend. Heck they may even turn on you and really it’s NOT their fault, chances are your drove them away yourself with out even realizing it.

So my advice to people who enjoy being miserable is simple.
There is more to life then just you, other people have just as many burdens to bare. Some just cope better then others but it does not mean we don’t want to be heard too, it does not mean we don’t care when we just don’t want to listen to you anymore it’s just we’ve had enough and until you can accept responsibility for your own life/actions/thoughts/feelings/emotions/attitude we don’t want to be around you.
Don’t ask for advice if it’s just going to fall on deaf ears or your just going to ignore it and throw it back in our faces.
If you say something DO IT don’t just talk about it.
And lastly remember the choice is and always has been yours, So if your life is really that crappy get out there and do something about it.
Where there is a will there is a way.

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Posted by Tami Croft   @   29 June 2011 0 comments

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